I Love You To the Moon and Back
by anabelle12
Summary: NS one-shot/futurefic/songfic based on Taylor Swift's song Ronan.


_I remember your bare feet down the hallway _

_I remember your little laugh_

"Dada!" the little boy screamed, running over to his father. "Hey little man!" Nate said, scooping up his son. Serena walked into the living room. "I gotta go B. Have fun in Paris!" the blonde said, hanging up the phone. "Did you have a fun day with mommy?" Nate asked his son. "We had ice cream!" the little boy screamed. "Oh did you now?" Nate said with a smirk on his face. "Liam!" Serena said, pretending to be mad. "You weren't supposed to tell him!" The little boy erupted into a fit of giggles. Serena looked lovingly at her son. Her baby. Nate set him down on the ground and he started running around. "That's my boy." Nate thought to himself.

_Race cars on the kitchen floor  
Plastic dinosaurs,_

Serena walked into Liam's room. It was a wreck. All his toys were strewn about. She was going to tell him not to make such a mess, but he and Nate looked like they were having so much fun with those little toy cars he adored. The only thing not out of place was the little dinosaur Eric got him from a trip he went on. Rex. She smiled to herself. Let him be happy.

_I love you to the moon and back_

Nate came to tuck Liam in again, even though the little boy was already asleep. He pushed the little boy's thumb out of his mouth and put the covers on top of him again. He had a habit of kicking the covers off. "Just like Serena." Nate thought to himself. He planted a kiss on Liam's forehead. "I love you Liam. To the-" "moon and back." the little boy mumbled.

_I remember your blue eyes looking into mine like we had our own secret club_

"Who ate the last cookie?" Serena hollered with a giggle. She already new the boys ate all the cookies. Nate and Liam made eye contact from across the living room. Blue met blue. They wouldn't rat each other out. "I dunno." the little boy said. "Me either, S." Nate called back. "Well played little man." Nate whispered as he gave his son a high-five.

_I remember you dancing before bed time then jumping on me waking me up_

"Mama! Santa came!" Liam screamed, jumping onto Nate and Serena's bed. "Merry Christmas Liam!" Serena said groggily. "Presents!" the little boy urged. "C'mon." Serena said, picking up Liam and holding Nate's hand, walking towards the Christmas Tree.

_I can still feel you hold my hand  
Little man, even from that moment I knew  
You fought it hard like an army guy_

Nate and Serena walked through the hospital to the pediatrics wing, on either side of Liam, holding each of his tiny hands.

The nurse came into the brightly colored room. "I'm gonna put this into your arm but it will make you all better, okay?" Liam nodded his head. He was too brave for four years old. "Do you want me to hold your hand?" Serena asked. "No mama. I'm a big boy."

_Remember I leaned in and whispered to you_

Liam's breathing was slowing down. The cancer was winning. Nate laid down next to Liam on the hospital bed. Before it seemed so small, but it was so much larger than Liam's small, frail figure. "Hey little man. When we get out of here, what do you wanna do?" Nate whispered, tears rolling down his face. "Can we have ice cream?" the little boy managed to get out, fighting for air. "Of course. We can have all the ice cream you want." "I love you, Dada." Even though he didn't say the words, Nate knew Liam was saying goodbye. "I love you too Liam."

_Come on baby with me  
We're gonna fly away from here  
You were my best four years_

_I remember the drive home when the blind hope  
Turned to crying and screaming, "Why?"_

"My baby boy is gone._" _Serena said, in total shock. She could see tears running down Nate's face. He couldn't even speak. He just pulled Serena into his arms and held her. His little boy is dead. "He never did anything wrong! Why did it have to be him? It should've been me!" Serena screamed. "It should've been me." she said quietly.

_Flowers piled up in the worst way  
No one knows what to say about a beautiful boy who died_

Flowers. Flowers and food. Everywhere. They all had the same basic message, "I'm so sorry about your loss." Liam deserved more than this. He wasn't just any person. He was an angel who's life was cut too short.

_And it's about to be Halloween  
You could be anything you wanted if you were still here_

Nate looked through his computer. Liam made a list of things he wanted to be for Halloween. It broke his heart. His little boy would never get to have all these fun experiences. They were supposed to match for Halloween. He wanted to laugh at the vision of having matching costumes, which would be ridiculous, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He slammed his computer shut and buried his face in his hands.

_I remember the last day when I kissed your face  
I whispered in your  
Come on baby with me  
We're gonna fly away from here  
Out of this curtained room in this hospital grey  
We'll just disappear_

"We can go to the beach together. Remember how much you loved the-" "sand." the little boy muttered out. "Yeah, you loved making sandcastles with me and daddy, didn't you? And we can go eat ice cream with Uncle Eric. Doesn't that sound fun?" Serena said softly, trying to be strong for her son. The little boy gave the slightest nod of his head. "I love you baby boy." she said, as a tear made its way down her face. "I love you too mama." Liam's heartbeat slowed until it he flatlined.

_Come on baby with me  
We're gonna fly away from here  
You were my best four years_

_What if I'm standing in your closet trying to talk to you?_

"Hey Liam. It's Dad. Remember this?" Nate said, picking up Liam's favorite toy dinosaur. Nate would go into Liam's room everyday, remembering everything that they had done. It made him feel like his little boy was still there. He needed that.

_What if I kept the hand me downs you won't grow into?_

In the very back of her closet, Serena kept some of the clothes she had bought Liam just before he-. Sometimes, on bad days, she would pull out those clothes and try to imagine what stains he would've gotten onto the clothes. It broke her heart, but pieced it back together at the same time.

_And what if I really thought some miracle would see us through?_

"I was hoping for a Christmas miracle." Nate admitted. He had never told that to anyone. Not even Serena.

_But what if the miracle was even getting one moment with you_

"What if spending one last Christmas together was your Christmas miracle?" his therapist suggested. Maybe it was.

_Come on baby with me  
We're gonna fly away from here  
Come on baby with me  
We're gonna fly away from here  
You were my best four years_

_I remember your bare feet down the hallway_

"Our angel who's life was cut short. Thank you for the best four years of our lives, baby boy. We love you to the moon and back."

_I love you to the moon and back_

Serena cried as she ran her hand across the engraved letters on his tombstone. Nate set the toy dinosaur down in front of the tombstone. "Goodbye Liam." he whispered.

fin.

**A/N: So yesterday I stumbled across this song and started crying and I had it on repeat for about an hour and somehow I ended up writing this. The song is Ronan by Taylor Swift and its absolutely beautiful. RIP Ronan, hope you're having a good time in Heaven. **


End file.
